Good, Clean Fun
Washing your beautiful new shiny BMW on a sunny day - good, clean fun.
Going bowling with the cousins and girlfriends - good, clean fun.
Paying your ever-increasing line of credit online - good, clean fun (in that you dont have to wait in line at the bank).
Reading a bedtime story to the little one - good, clean fun.
Isheeta - is NOT an activity, hence is NOT good, clean fun.
I am beginning to feel like a broken record that has had a carton of expired milk spilled all over. I feel like Calamity Jane high on steriods. You know what they all have in common? WAY PAST their expiry date.
I am most definitely not way past my expiry date. You know why? Because I'm fucking extra-ordinary! And so I definitely will not entertain, "but lets just have some good clean fun, baby!" from shitheads. Because baby, THAT phrase, those 3 llittle words - as beautiful they may sound to a guy are definitely NOT the 3 little words every girl hopes to hear from the man she is interested in. Those 3 words are the plague reincarnated. They belong to the dinosaur era! Grow up! Grow some balls! If you want to have fun with me, be a man and shoulder some of that responsibilities/difficulties/headaches that comes with being a MAN in a relationship.
Responsibilities are not that bad as one makes them out to be. Sometimes they are fun. Because in addition to headaches, they also come with perks. And you can only appreciate the value of perks, if you work for it. Like jobs.
Ive just spent the last week scouring job sites looking for employment. Now that I have finally finished this program, I can officially stop telling people that I'm a student, and have proceeded to promote myself to a professional B.U.M.
It is not pretty!
I dont know how people do it - I mean, stay patient. I am so damn impulsive. Not a good thing to write on your resume. Scouring for clothes and shoes in a busy mall with 70% off everything is comparatively a walk in the park. Writing random letters to strangers grovelling for an opportunity is like walking on hot coals using your nipples for balance (OUCH!!!!!!!)
I know this will be the most depressing, humbling, boring, excruciatingly painful time of my life. A guy telling you he wants to have only good, clean fun with you comes a relative close second to match this feeling. But you know what, I figure moments like these comes once in a blue moon (the job search, not the dickhead requests), so I figure I should prepare myself for the worst.
I need to be productive.
This is the worst part. How can you be productive, with no money? With gas prices shooting astronomical levels, Im restricted to Mississausage, where everything shuts down at 6 pm. Shopping is fun, but thats only good when youve had a bad day, and I cant do that EVERY day since unemployment days are all bad days. Ive joined a recreational club, but I will feel like such a loser going in ALONE. I got all pumped up today to go dancing... I drive all the way, can't find parking, and then I just... pulled a complete unIsheeta-like stunt. I drove back home. I couldn't fathom the thought of walking into one of these places alone. Even though every one walks in alone. Aargh! But thats ok, one can salsa for only so long till one gets sick of breathing in sweat fumes. Theatre is nice, but thats like being one of those losers who walks into a date movie alone. I cant do that. I forgot what it was like to have fun. I guess this is what all Type A personality Doctors must feel like... hahahaha.
How is it that I can't even have some Good Clean Fun on my own? How did I reach the epitomy of drollness? Is drollness even a word? Why am I up on a Saturday morning wondering if a word fits in the lexicon when I should be revelling in my new-found freedom minus books? My parents aren't here, I could go out all night and never even have to worry about curfew... and all I did was watch a bit of The Fugitive and a bit of Ice Age. And that was what was showing on the telly, not even rental... because I got too lazy to go out.
I need new hobbies. I need to be wonder woman all over again. I need to stop thinking about consequences of going out. I need to just get back into the game. Not THAT kinda game - sorry, player men are useless trolls. I need to laugh at just stupid Good Clean Fun game requests from fucktards and just do stuff like ... I dunno, play ultimate frisbees or joining a league or going to picnics or feeding kittens at the Humane Society or just painting the town red.
I need to get Serious and Dirty.
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